Today marks the second anniversary that Deanie made her choice to leave this life.
It was very late this evening that she left.
That is providing the inquest does not say different and give the date as 17th?
Yes, two years later the inquest has still not happened and so, I do not know the date and time.
How does it feetears l to be here, in this moment?
It is very hard right now.
I have been awake since 05:15. Whist stood in my bathroom, I experienced a couple of flashes of light that seemed to originate outside. As I opened the window and peered into the darkness, there was nothing. What that was, I can't explain...
I made some tea and returned to bed where I wrote some words ready to share later and listened to the track we have made her song, See You Again by Wiz Khalifa and Charlie Puth. I have also cried many tears.
It is honestly hard to put into words how it feels.
The pain you feel can keep up on you hitting you harder than you expected, as it has for me.
It is not all pain and tears, there are lighter moments when you can write or remember fun times and plan to celebrate.
Today I will be eating foods I should not, having sweet treats and enjoying it, the way I know Deanie would have.
Andrea and I shall be lighting a candle for her at the Glastonbury Chalice Well Gardens later and also putting her photo on the Glastonbury Memorial Tree too.
So there will lots of happy things as well as tears and sadness but, you kinda have to have both, bringing balance to the day.
There are also others to consider too. Many others miss her and it is important to spare a thought for them too.
I do my best to remember that, even though it might be hard to at times, because we all need to talk or at least have that space held for us to, whether we chose to talk or not.
There is not much more I can say right now as I am feeling the tears coming once more.
All I will say is that I Love You Deanie xxx
I look forward to hugging away the pain,
When I see you again xxx
Dad
No comments:
Post a Comment